How To Build Trust Without Saying a Word

Building trust is crucial to all working relationships, and it seems that the frenetic and hyper-connected pace of modern life asks us to build trust with colleagues and clients faster than ever before.

Trust is a strange thing- built much less on what is said than how it is said- the mannerisms; the eye contact; the posture that accompanies the words- and how that person makes us feel. Trust is largely built on non-verbal communication: when the body language dances in tune with the words being spoken.

Much of the literature on body language in the recruitment sector tends to be from the ‘interview-winning and self-confidence’ perspective, and we’ve written about this before. Yet less attention has been given to how our body language feeds into our long-term relationships with the people around us.

When we initially meet our colleagues, candidates and clients, it’s startling to learn that our first impressions of each other are only fractionally built on the words we say. The ‘formula’ of first impressions is that words only account for 7%, tone of voice accounts for 38%- and body language a staggering 55%!

There are of course opportunities to build trust after a first meeting, but if your body language is sending the wrong messages then your professional relationship will almost certainly suffer a lack of trust. Remember, people don’t offer opportunities to those that they don’t trust, and they don’t easily follow the direction and ideas of those they don’t trust either.

As a recruiter, building a strong and rapid foundation of trust with candidates, clients and your colleagues is vital. As a lot of your contact will take place over the phone, when you do get the chance to meet in person it is doubly as important that your body language conveys a sense of authenticity, warmth and confidence.

So, how do you ensure that your body language sends the message that you are trustworthy?

1. Even if you read no further, read this one. Mirroring people’s expressions is the most powerful way of making people feel at ease. By this, I mean nodding along to show you’re interested, frowning when they’re showing concern, and smiling when they’re talking about something good. You can even mirror their movements slightly- in fact in business it’s been proven that if you subtly mirror movements that you are overwhelmingly more likely to close a deal.

Remember: Don’t exaggerate this- most of it will come naturally once you start as mirroring is a natural phenomenon of human behaviour. It isn’t copying exactly what someone is doing. Research recommends you do 50% of what the other person does. You almost certainly already do it with the people you love and are at ease with.

2. Eye contact. Studies have shown that if we like someone, we look at them a lot more, and that we are perceived as untrustworthy when we don’t have a strong level of eye contact. Aim to keep eye contact during around 80% of the conversation.

 Remember, this is not a Mexican stare-off, and it will make people very uncomfortable if you maintain eye contact without breaking now and then. This is particularly true when you first meet someone, as it is human instinct to need to look a person over upon meeting. Smile, shake hands, then look down to your papers or laptop briefly to allow the person to have a good look at you. Sounds strange, but you will create a level of comfort this way.

3. Keep your posture straight and open– if you feel the need to cross your arms then just put your hands together in a relaxed fashion. Keeping a straight back and open shoulders conveys a powerful sense of confidence, which is a necessary building block for trust to grow in business.

Remember: even if you’re faking it, ‘power-poses’ have been proven to trick our mind into releasing cortisol and testosterone, the confidence hormones.

4. A firm handshake is vital to inspiring confidence. Studies have shown that firm handshakes inspire confidence…and limp handshakes can really hurt your chances of being hired (and trusted.)

Remember: this is not a strongman competition, and ‘bone-crusher’ handshakes will often be interpreted as an attempt to bully or assert authority over the other person. Try out your handshake on friends and find out if you need to change your handshake style.

Body language is such a powerful form of communication in the workplace that much more attention should be given to it when forming professional relationships. Yet the ‘hacks’ described here are relatively simple to adopt- so get started today and reap the benefits of trust with clients and colleagues.